Saturday, January 22, 2005 | 12:58 AM

*Overwhelmed* Dedicated to Alex

If u were in my shoes, you'll be darn sad. DARN DARN sad. I feel terrible and guilty. I was very happy when I read from Aloysius' blog that Alex is starting to blog again. I feel so cos' I persuaded him to do bloggin cos 'when he leaves us one day we'll be able to capture all e memories and times together'. That was roughly how I persuaded him lor. But tt was before any of us including him knows tt he can't stay till his As and instead got to leave ard April. This is super saddening lor...

Somehow inside me I felt tt if I didn't say tt to him such a thing won't so 'coincidentally' happen le. To put it bluntly, I felt guilty. Besides tt, I happen to take same bus as him in the mornings BUT I've never spoke a word despite knowing he's an OGL of Sirius. Only had several chat sessions w/ him on MSN. I think my shy nature really break me frm my social circle be it female or male. It sucks.

Before I know Lx, I feared one thing. That is, he'll be in another scenario like KoZaw as I hate it when I get to know someone and sadly he/she has to leave one day and god-knows-when then return. Its pain-staking. Well, tt time he only told me tt he'll nt return to Indonesia or smth liddat. I was relieved cos I dun want to see friends leaving... going away... BUT now the fear has rised. His blog resseructed, our fears resseructed. Ironic. Guilty. *sighs* Mst of us(OGMs) barely know him but we already feel so lost. I wonder how the OGLs cope w/ this indespicable fact. Gals, u can weep it all out. Guys I dunno, cos its nt right to cry out loud... even if u try u won't. The most u'll feel LOST and DOWN...

Lx, I sincerly hope u will stay. I mean my words. Its not easy for us to forget u or even live w/ ur absence. So, if there's a possibility u must try to stay. Imagine how ur CG mates will feel w/ tt empty seat in class... tt empty column in the namelist... how ur soccer dudes will feel w/ u missing frm e usual hangout... how SIRIUS will feel w/o this OGL? How all of us will feel w/ u missing in action!? I know I've got u to cont ur blog but I doubt if I can persuade you to stay on. But (touchwood) if u got to go, I wish you all the best and DO visit us whenever possible. We'll keep in touch ya? I hope I'm nt giving u any pressure tho.

P.s. If u've realised there's no 'wahahaha', 'kekez', 'lolx' or 'heeheez' in this entry. Its on a very sombre note. And I hope all of us realise this fact. Siriusly, I'm on the verge of weeping... :(